merciful

at dawn’s pink answering, my buzzing flesh ceased
life’s bell had called upon me—it was young and miserable then
in black bleating sheep came the pale lying misery

it fell asleep in god’s twitching thumb
it rolled in with the lazy maiden’s tide
it loathed and bathed against itself like a pig
it sought out a mongrel of grinning death
it believed i could be—let it’s fat beastly body get in bed with me

truth was prodded ‘til white and leaf-like, all veins surged
stalemate in chess, everything in life; hope’s diabolical continuum
at dawn’s answering i rejoiced in the ringing